It's 8:44 p.m., e.s.t. on Monday, Memorial Day.

Niko is upstairs getting ready for a shower. All the critters, minus Wild Thing, are down here with me, napping. You can read about Wild Thing's passing here.

I came back to Fort Lauderdale last Tuesday and have had a difficult time readjusting myself mentally, physically and spiritually. Still am, in fact. I wish it was as easy as simply readjusting my balls and cock like when I'm not wearing underwear; all the goodies just stick to my thigh and they have to be peeled apart before I sit down or when I stand up.

This last trip to NYC was very different. It was 2 weeks, as opposed to last year's necessary visit of 6. Although last year's visit was emotionally painful due to my mom's breast cancer diagnosis (click here for details on that visit), I at least had some focus with working on a daily basis, no family drama.

And even through the worst of it, mom and I had some really good bonding moments last year. She showed me that although she was my mom, she was a woman first; beautifully human and fantastically flawed, just as we all are.

I know this is not quite what you want to read about in a porn blog. However, for me, porn is very intricately involved in my daily life. It's very difficult to simply pull out this part of me and just write about porn.

The good thing about this most recent trip to NYC is that it's over. I'm back home with Niko, and, although I came down with a fever while I was up there, a day and a half before I was scheduled to return, I'm doing much better. Still not quite motivated to do work, but stumbling some and going through the motions.

The fever was so bad I actually had to wear a hat as well as sweats and a nice, thick comforter.


The other cool thing is that I got to work with rawTop, whom you can read about by clicking here. It was fun getting to know him, getting to work with him and getting to share a bottom with him! You can read about that, by clicking here. Both, rawTop and his partner are very nice and easy to be with. In fact one of the main reasons for extending my trip to NYC from one week to two, was because I wanted to meet rawTop and, hopefully, get to do some work for him from home as part of my continuing quest to remain self-employed. As opposed to working for someone else.

For now, I leave you with another picture of a sign I found to be comical. This is from last year, at Coney Island Hospital, when I went with my mom and literally spent the entire day waiting to be called. We both knew what the sign meant and what it was for. We also knew it was silly to laugh at it, but it was very Beavis and Butthead mixed in with some Peter Griffin. Besides, without humour, even sex is bull and doring. Yeah. it's like that. I was going to fix it but, what the fuck.

More to come.